Articles, Blog

Trump Fears The Coronavirus Crisis Will Spoil His Reelection Campaign

March 6, 2020


WELCOME TO “THE LATE SHOW.” I’M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT. THE BIG STORY–
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
I’M GLAD TO HEAR THESE PEOPLE
ALL SOUND HEALTHY AND HAPPY, BECAUSE THE BIG STORY CONTINUES
TO BE THE LOOMING THREAT OF THE CORONAVIRUS. FOR LENT, I AM GIVING UP LICKING
DOORKNOBS. NOW, CONCERNS OF A GLOBAL
PANDEMIC ARE GROWING, BUT FEAR NOT– THE PRESIDENT KNOWS HE HAS
A SOLEMN DUTY TO PROTECT HIMSELF, BECAUSE THE TRUMP
CAMPAIGN IS AFRAID THAT THE CORONAVIRUS WILL HURT HIS
RE-ELECTION BID. I LOOK FORWARD TO THAT
TRANSCRIPT BEING RELEASED.( AS TRUMP )
“HELLO, UKRAINE? I NEED INFORMATION ON A
‘HUNTER’ CORONAVIRUS.”( LAUGHTER )
SO YESTERDAY, TRUMP TRIED TO REASSURE US.>>THERE’S A VERY GOOD CHANCE
YOU’RE NOT GOING TO DIE.( LAUGHTER ).>>Stephen: OH, REALLY? REALLY?>>Jon: YE, REALLY NICE.>>Stephen: THAT’S VERY
COMFORTING. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.( AS PILOT )
“AH, THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SPEAKING. WE ARE BEGINNING OUR FINAL
DESCENT INTO CHICAGO’S O’HARE AIRPORT. PUT YOUR TRAY TABLES UP, BECAUSE
WE’VE GOT A SOLID CHANCE OF LANDING THIS SUCKER. I SAY, ODDS ARE 60-40 WE WALK
AWAY FROM THIS.” TRUMP KNOWS WHO’S TO BLAME FOR
WHAT HE SEES AS UNNECESSARY PANIC: “LOW RATINGS FAKE NEWS
MSDNC, COMCAST, AND CNN ARE DOING EVERYTHING POSSIBLE TO
MAKE THE CARE-ONAVIRUS LOOK AS BAD AS POSSIBLE.”( AS TRUMP )
“THE CARE-ONAVIRUS IS TOTALLY CONTAINED. IT WILL NOT BECOME A
PAM-DAME-IC, LIKE SMALL PAX, THE SWANE FLU, OR SEARS.”( LAUGHTER )
NOW, WHY IS HE BLAMING THE MEDIA FOR A DISEASE? WELL, HERE’S THE THING, THE
STOCK MARKET FELL ALMOST 2,000 POINTS IN TWO DAYS AND WAS DOWN
AGAIN TODAY. SO TO QUELL THE PANIC ON THE
STREET, TRUMP DISPATCHED WHITE HOUSE ECONOMIC ADVISER AND–
OH, MY GOD. HE’S GOT THE VIRUS!( LAUGHTER )
I’M SORRY, THAT’S JUST WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE. LARRY KUDLOW. KUDLOW WENT ON THE TV YESTERDAY
AND HE SAID THESE WORDS:>>WE HAVE CONTAINED THIS. WE HAVE CONTAINED THIS. I WON’T SAY AIRTIGHT, BUT PRETTY
CLOSE TO AIRTIGHT.>>Stephen: OH, GOOD, OH,
GOOD. BECAUSE ALL YOU NEED TO PREVENT
THE SPREAD OF A VIRUS IS “PRETTY CLOSE TO AIRTIGHT.” I MEAN, WE ALL WATCHED “THE HOT
ZONE”:>>HOLE! HOLE! HOLE! IT’S STILL PRETTY CLOSE TOW
AIRTIGHT.( LAUGHTER )
>>Stephen: ANOTHER I DON’T KNOW HOW THAT SHOW ENDS. ANOTHER TRUMP GUY TRYING TO PUT
THE NATION AT EASE IS ACTING HOMELAND SECURITY SECRETARY AND
MAN WHO LOOKS LIKE HIS NAME IS CHAD WOLF. CHAD WOLF. YESTERDAY, IN HIS SENATE
TESTIMONY, THE WOLF GOT NEUTERED BY REPUBLICAN JOHN KENNEDY ABOUT
THE PERCENTAGE OF CORONAVIRUS MORTALITY RATES.>>IT’S BETWEEN WOEN.5 AND 2%.>>OKAY, WHAT’S THE MORTALITY
RATE FOR INFLUENZA OVER THE LAST, SAY, TEN YEARS?>>IT’S ALSO RIGHT AROUND THAT
PERCENTAGE AS WELL. I DON’T HAVE THAT OFFHAND, BUT
IT’S AROUND 2% AS WELL.>>YOU SURE OF THAT?>>IT’S A LITTLE– YES SIR.>>Stephen: JUDGES? (“PRICE IS RIGHT” LOSING
TROMBONE SOUNDS) CHAD, I’M SORRY. THE MORTALITY RATE FOR THE FLU
IS ACTUALLY AROUND 0.1%. SO HE WAS ONLY OFF BY 2000%. HE WOULD BE A TERRIBLE
PHARMACIST.( AS PHARMACIST )
“OKAY, HERE’S YOUR PRESCRIPTION. YOU’RE GOING TO WANT TO TAKE 200
PILLS EVERY FOUR MINUTES WITH A MEAL.” LOUVRE LAUGH
NOW, FEAR OF THE VIRUS HAS LED MANY TO WEAR MASKS IN THE UNITED
STATES, AND THE C.D.C. HAS RELEASED THIS ACTUAL GRAPHIC,
DETAILING WHICH STYLES OF FACIAL HAIR ARE BEST FOR WEARING
RESPIRATOR MASKS AND WHICH ONES DO NOT WORK. OH, GOD, ALL OF BROOKLYN IS
DEAD. LOUVRE LAUGH THIGH WILL BE
MISSED. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THEY WILL BE MISSED. OF COURSE, THE STYLE THAT GIVES
THE MASK THE BEST SEAL IS CLEAN-SHAVEN, BUT OTHER SAFE
STYLES INCLUDE ZORRO, WALRUS, AND, BEST OF ALL, SOUL PATCH. SO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR
CONTINUED HEALTH SMASH MOUTH! ♪ SOMEBODY ONCE TOLD ME
MY BEARD WAS GONNA SAVE ME ♪ I’M PRETTY COOL THAT
I’M NOT DEAD ♪ NOTICE WE’RE ALL– THAT’S ALL
THERE IS, THAT’S ALL THERE IS OF THAT SONG. WE’RE ALL STILL RECOVERING FROM
LAST NIGHT’S DEMOCRATIC DEBATE, WHERE ALL THE CANDIDATES ADOPTED
BERNIE’S PLAN OF YELLING ABOUT BERNIE’S PLANS. LOUVER LAUGH
I’LL CATCH YOU UP ON THE CAMPAIGN IN TONIGHT’S:
>>I HAVE A PLAN FOR THAT.>>I BEAT TRUMP.>>THE BIGGEST MISCONCEPTION IS
THAT I’M BORING.>>WE’RE AT EACH OTHERS’
THROATS.>>MADE A LOT OF MONEY.>>I’M GOING TO BEAT THIS MAN
LIKE A DRUM.>>BING-BING, BOANG-BONG.>>”FURY ROAD TO THE WHITE
HOUSE, 2020.”>>Stephen: TODAY–
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
PEOPLE LOVE– PEOPLE LOVE “THE
FURY ROAD.” TODAY, DONALD TRUMP JUMPED IN
WITH HIS OWN REVIEW OF THE DEBATE:
“CRAZY, CHAOTIC DEMOCRAT DEBATE LAST NIGHT. FAKE NEWS SAID BIDEN DID WELL,
EVEN THOUGH HE SAID HALF OF OUR POPULATION WAS SHOT TO DEATH. WOULD BE OVER FOR MOST. MINI-MIKE WAS WEAK AND UNSTEADY,
BUT HELPED GREATLY BY HIS MANY COMMERCIALS, WHICH ARE NOT
SUPPOSED TO BE ALLOWED– DOT, DOT, DOT, DOT, DOT, DOT, DOT,
DOT– DURING A DEBATE. POCAHONTAS WAS MEAN AND
UNDISCIPLINED, MOSTLY AIMING AT CRAZY BERNIE AND MINI-MIKE. THEY DON’T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE
HER, BUT I KNOW SHE IS A “CHOCKER.”( LAUGHTER )
“CHOKE.>>Stephen: “CHOKER.” I THINK HE WAS TRYING TO SPELL
“CHOKER” BUT FAILED TO PERFORM THE CRUCIAL TASK AT THE KEY
MOMENT WHEN EVERYTHING WAS ON THE LINE. NOW, ONE CANDIDATE WHO’S WORKING
HARD– TOOK A SECOND BUT THUMP. ONE CANDIDATE WHO’S WORKING HARD
TO RECAPTURE THE LEAD IS FORMER VICE PRESIDENT AND MAN WHO
BREAKS ALL THE HEARTS ON BINGO NIGHT, JOE BIDEN.( LAUGHTER )
JOE HAS BEEN HITTING THE TRAIL HARD IN RECENT WEEKS, AND HE’S
BEEN REPEATING THIS STORY ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED WHEN HE TRIED TO
VISIT NELSON MANDELA IN PRISON.>>I CAME BACK FROM SOUTH AFRICA
TRYING TO SEE NELSON MANDELA AND GETTING ARRESTED FOR TRYING TO
SEE HIM ON ROBBIN’S ISLAND. I HAD THE GREAT HONOR OF MEETING
HIM. I HAD THE GREAT HONOR OF BEING
ARRESTED WITH OUR U.N. AMBASSADOR TRYING TO GET TO SEE
HIM IN ROBBINS ISLAND.>>Stephen: THAT’SOON
INCREDIBLY MOVING STORY. THE ONLY THING THAT WOULD MAKE
IT EVEN MORE MOVING IS IS IF IT HAPPENED. BECAUSE, TURNS OUT, HE WAS NOT
ARRESTED. IN FACT, HIS CAMPAIGN HAS
ADMITTED THAT, NO, HE DID NOT WHILE HE WAS A CONGRESSIONALLAL
TRIP IN THE 1970s, BIDEN WAS NOTE ARRESTED BUT HE WAS
SEPARATED FROM HIS PARTY AT THE AIRPORT. NELSON MANDELA WAS IN PRISON FOR
27 YEARS BUT ONE TIME I LOST SIGHT OF MY COWORKERS IN A DELTA
TERMINAL. WAIT, WHERE DID YOU GO? THERE YOU ARE. THERE YOU ARE. WYATT, YOU’RE GONE NOW. BARACK! BARACK!( LAUGHTER )
SPEAKING OF DELUSIONAL, FORMER NEW YORK MAYOR AND OLD MAN
ASKING “NOW IS THIS THE WHIP OR THE NAE NAE.” MICHAEL BLOOMBERG. MAYOR BLOOMBERG HAS GOTTEN A LOT
OF ATTENTION FOR OPENING A FIRE HYDRANT OF MONEY TO SPREAD HIS
CORE MESSAGE THAT HE HAS A FIRE HYDRANT OF MONEY AND NOW HE’S
TRYING TO PUSH THINGS EVEN FURTHER BY CLAIMING HE TOOK ON A
NEW CAMPAIGN ADVISER: THE FORMER PRESIDENT OF E! THAT’S RIGHT, HE’S GETTING
ADVICE FROM THE FOLKS THAT BROUGHT YOU THE KARDASHIANS. SO GET READY TO SEE MIKE
BLOOMBERG BREAK THE INTERNET. HE LOOKS GOOD. HE LOOKS REALLY GOOD. APPARENTLY, THE PRIMARY TASK OF
THIS NEW ADVISOR IS TO GET LATE-NIGHT HOSTS TO WORK
CAMPAIGN THEMES INTO THEIR MONOLOGUES, CLAIMING, “IF YOU
HEAR STEPHEN COLBERT MENTIONING MIKE BLOOMBERG MORE OFTEN IN THE
COMING WEEKS, IT MAY NOT BE BY ACCIDENT.” I RESENT THAT ACCUSATION! LOUVRE LAUGH
ALL OF MY MONOLOGUE COMES TOGETHER BY ACCIDENT.( LAUGHTER )
JIM, SHOW HIM MY WRITERS’ ROOM. THAT’S MY HEAD WRITER. THAT’S PICKLES. THAT IS MY HEAD WRITER, PICKLES. HE HAS BEEN WITH ME SINCE ’57. HE’S NOT TRYING TO BUY TIME IN
LATE NIGHT. HE WANTS TO DEVELOP UNPAID
RELATIONSHIPS WITH LATE-NIGHT TALK SHOW HOSTS. WHICH I FIND EVEN MORE
INSULTING. AS A PRINCIPLED COMEDIAN, I
WOULD NEVER SHAPE MY CONTENT AROUND A PERSON OR A BRAND FOR
FREE. NO! NO!>>Jon: COME ON NOW.>>Stephen: THAT WOULD BE A
BETRAYAL OF ALL THE BRANDS WHO PAY ME. SO, MICHAEL BLOOMBERG, LISTEN
HERE: IF YOU COME KNOCKING ON MY DOOR, I WON’T ANSWER. BUT I WILL KNOW YOU’RE THERE
THANKS TO NEST DOORBELL FROM GOOGLE. WE’VE GOT A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT. JASON SEGAL IS HERE. BUT WHEN WE RETURN, I HAVE A
MEAL WITH ELIZABETH WARREN. STICK AROUND.

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100 Comments

  • Reply Judi Spackman March 2, 2020 at 9:11 pm

    WOW! I AM VOTING MIKE RIGHT NOW AND EVERY EVENING UNTIL FOREVER. YAY BLOOMBURG.

  • Reply F L March 2, 2020 at 9:11 pm

    the better way of handling the situation surrounding corona virus
    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/explainers-51632801

  • Reply Matthew Carter March 2, 2020 at 9:56 pm

    BARACK BARACK!!!💀💀💀💀💀

  • Reply oldrrocr March 2, 2020 at 10:06 pm

    trump's outlook on coronavirus – so we will have a lower unemployment rate – what's the problem?

  • Reply Ab Ba March 2, 2020 at 11:14 pm

    Chad Wolf hahahahahahaha douchebag

  • Reply TheViperFan March 2, 2020 at 11:46 pm

    Do you remember the good, old days, when Trump altered a wheather-map with a sharpie?!
    😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • Reply CRAZY GERMAN SHEPHERD LADY March 2, 2020 at 11:54 pm

    🤣😂😅😄😂🤣

  • Reply Rasmey Yim March 3, 2020 at 12:06 am

    Trump doesn't know how to spell Corona because he doesn't drink. I'm sure he knows how to spell Cocaine with all the sniffling he does.

  • Reply veronica Alleyne March 3, 2020 at 1:02 am

    I hope like hell it finishes him forever

  • Reply Sue Lee March 3, 2020 at 1:03 am

    At least he isn't blaming the Russians.

  • Reply Eva Daly March 3, 2020 at 1:17 am

    After hearing trump talk at the WH on the vires, I don't know what to believe, he speaks about different things that are false,and putting Pence in charge we are in for a real trouble now.

  • Reply Ten4man Ten4man March 3, 2020 at 1:36 am

    I think this moron SC should be wearing a mask, so we can't hear him and maybe put hisself to sleep. Trump 2020

  • Reply Sergio Spivak March 3, 2020 at 1:38 am

    COLBERT IS AN IDIOT

  • Reply Poof March 3, 2020 at 1:42 am

    Pro tip, when the audience doesn’t laugh and you have to wait, it’s not funny. Adding in the piano player doesn’t help

  • Reply MA MA MA MA MY CORONA March 3, 2020 at 1:52 am

    Probably shouldn't joke around with this

  • Reply Dave Zimmerman March 3, 2020 at 2:09 am

    Stephen is a moron. You guys that watch this crap are getting brainwashed by the democrats and funny thing is you dont even realize it. So funny!

  • Reply Linda name March 3, 2020 at 2:11 am

    Is Rush dead yet?

  • Reply M&P Shield March 3, 2020 at 2:30 am

    Haha! He doesn't have to fear anything! "We The People" have his back! TRUMP WINS IN A LANDSLIDE! 🇺🇸#kag

  • Reply Jason Powell March 3, 2020 at 2:36 am

    Yep, the trumpet out for himself yet again

  • Reply Sadie May Castellano March 3, 2020 at 4:25 am

    😛🚪knobs

  • Reply ubiquity March 3, 2020 at 5:22 am

    You want Trump to lose so badly. HE WON'T! 😂😂😂

  • Reply Lisa Payne March 3, 2020 at 5:44 am

    Rare is the person who can make me LMAO like Colbert the Consistent. Geez I needed that. And all caught up on the dealio, without the fuss! 😂

  • Reply khaos8 March 3, 2020 at 6:56 am

    Biden: "arrested in the streets of Soweto while trying to see Mandela on Robbens Island…" Soweto is 900 miles away from Robbens Island: geographically improbable: https://citizen.co.za/news/news-world/2245251/joe-biden-claims-to-have-been-arrested-in-soweto-while-trying-to-see-mandela-on-robben-island/

  • Reply Jose Hernandez March 3, 2020 at 8:50 am

    Democrats show how happy they are this hurts the economy and unemployment. Oh how you rejoice in bad things was so foretold in the bible so thanks for confirming it yet again.

  • Reply Jose Hernandez March 3, 2020 at 8:51 am

    Of course editing makes everything look bad

  • Reply Jose Hernandez March 3, 2020 at 8:53 am

    Do ur research its a bioweapon patent long ago by bill gates foundation. Enjoy ur democrats

  • Reply OurVenture 2019 March 3, 2020 at 9:29 am

    Why the century deadly black SWAIN was in China, not the USA? https://youtu.be/9axYghnoboY

  • Reply Екатерина Геннадиевна March 3, 2020 at 11:12 am

    I thought you were against having borders? It's kind of ironic for a fanatical Democrat to accuse Donald Trump when you are using a tragedy to push your political party forward.

  • Reply troy March 3, 2020 at 12:17 pm

    COLBERT=HILLARY'S DILDO

  • Reply jan deen March 3, 2020 at 1:00 pm

    You all get together and do the same pathetic uncreative backslapping crap . How do live with such tiny brains?

  • Reply Louise March 3, 2020 at 1:09 pm

    I love Stephen Colbert!

  • Reply Maria da Luz Moutinho March 3, 2020 at 1:25 pm

    O pânico pode ser grande…uma vez que o sistema de saúde não abrange os mais carenciados e cuidado!!

  • Reply uniquemetal March 3, 2020 at 2:14 pm

    The Coronavirus is Trump's Achilles heal for reelection and down fall He will not win. His supporters will finally see for what he is; unfit to be President in the way he has handled the Coronavirus Pandemic in USA.

  • Reply Robnation March 3, 2020 at 3:49 pm

    Got Zinc?

  • Reply Joseph Brown March 3, 2020 at 5:07 pm

    coronavirus activeted by 5G technology https://www.exopolitics.org/is-the-coronavirus-linked-to-chinas-rollout-of-5g-and-biowarfare/

  • Reply bobby bee March 3, 2020 at 5:28 pm

    I don't find this at all funny, seems the Amaricans think this is a joke,. Trump is a bloody idiot, he is a joke, and all you guy'y are just laughing, about it all. But then again 30,000 Americans died of the flu last year alone, never mentioned. So no wonder they have their heads up ther asses's, they just simply don't care. This guy making these inane jokes and comment's so infantile, what a load crap.

  • Reply joebridges187 March 3, 2020 at 6:03 pm

    Ol drunk ass Kudlow,,,

  • Reply John Stefanyszyn March 3, 2020 at 6:57 pm

    A germ-a-phobe. Didn't Donald Trump once declare that he was a germ-a-phobe. ( I believe he made that statement when the "golden shower" situation came up.)
    However, POTUS Trump stated at a recent rally that it was safe to be in the large crowd (even though the coronavirus is spreading everywhere ).
    The virus will definitely attend his rallies, in the large gatherings of thousands of people from all walks of life and from all parts of the USA.
    I wonder if any one informed germ-a-phobe POTUS Trump of this?
    Perhaps they did but he disregarded their warnings since , as he has always claimed, he knows better.
    BUT will he take the RISK to expose himself to the invisible coronavirus brought in, if by only one Trump supporter who has not been tested?
    Do you think that, being a germ-a-phobe, he will cancel the rallies or start doing them via video screen.

  • Reply Exotwin March 3, 2020 at 7:36 pm

    If America survive the virus will be thanks to the effort of your state governors,not your useless president, he only knows money,nothing else.

  • Reply TheDancingRomeo March 3, 2020 at 9:28 pm

    Remember when Stephen Colbert used to be funny?

  • Reply Priscilla Wilson March 3, 2020 at 9:47 pm

    I noticed the coronavirus map is free and clear across Russia.

  • Reply The Truth March 3, 2020 at 9:48 pm

    Sooooo, If heat kills COVID 19, just order everyone to go home and turn their heat up to 75-80 degrees…shouldn't that do it Dr. Trump??

  • Reply Hatem Teirelbar March 3, 2020 at 10:23 pm

    I love that Trump's wordplay is so mediocre, it's difficult to differentiate from his typos

  • Reply John Kurtz March 3, 2020 at 11:25 pm

    What about the USA pandemic agency? Oh yes, the very stable geeeneus fired them in 2018.

  • Reply Shabbernigdo Xingjian March 3, 2020 at 11:31 pm

    Once trump gets das boot this show is gonna die as well. I dont think colbert knows how to do a show that dosent involve trump anymore.

  • Reply Santanu Pal March 3, 2020 at 11:42 pm

    All of Broklyn is dead? Or half of Brooklyn is dead?

  • Reply 1suzanne11 March 3, 2020 at 11:42 pm

    You are a big mouth LIAR, and you are NOT FUNNY. You actually make me sick. I turn you off at night but then you had to have your previews. I guess I'll just have to stop watching CBS. Your mocking voice is sickening !!

  • Reply Ghost writer March 4, 2020 at 12:03 am

    Ex Used Car huckster
    Now pandering his my 15 minutes of therapy every night!

  • Reply Joe Figueroa March 4, 2020 at 12:35 am

    I don't understand why you have so much hate the man in office was labeled

  • Reply Joe Figueroa March 4, 2020 at 12:38 am

    I don't understand why the hate the man in office was labeled by Clinton as part of her camping. She call

  • Reply Joe Figueroa March 4, 2020 at 12:41 am

    Clinton called her opponent.

  • Reply Joe Figueroa March 4, 2020 at 12:41 am

    A series of

  • Reply Joe Figueroa March 4, 2020 at 12:42 am

    Hillary Clinton used

  • Reply Joe Figueroa March 4, 2020 at 12:42 am

    Hillary Clinton

  • Reply Joe Figueroa March 4, 2020 at 12:45 am

    I hate like homophobic misogynistic anti-feminist racist and more all I'm asking now for someone to prove gays are in the military accepted and respectedthe only thing is if you want to have a sex change you have to pay for itmonies for a sex change will come from you and not from and not from taxpayers that's allas to being misogynistic or racist I haven't seen anything if you do know something please let me know through this medium I'll be looking at it every day until someone answers thank you

  • Reply Joe Figueroa March 4, 2020 at 12:46 am

    Answer the why the hate with the right response you can change the world

  • Reply Kelley Sauer March 4, 2020 at 2:07 am

    and the Democrats hope it can spread

  • Reply pants March 4, 2020 at 3:47 am

    Pickles has great facial expressions!

  • Reply Wawa Washington March 4, 2020 at 4:01 am

    You aren't joking are you? It is not a joke!

  • Reply Patricia March 4, 2020 at 4:13 am

    Joe please stop with the embellishments.

  • Reply Dean Overholt March 4, 2020 at 5:01 am

    not funny. We need to work toegther not against each other. You are a jerk!

  • Reply George Sears March 4, 2020 at 5:21 am

    Lol you guys are glad about this virus cause in your minds it’s Trumps fault, pathetic, all of you don’t deserve to live in a free country you’re filth worthless trash.

  • Reply Karen Lm March 4, 2020 at 5:46 am

    I heard that VP Mike Pence might have been exposed to the coronavirus. He shook hands with every cadet from Sarasota Military Academy and came into contact with cadets whose fellow classmate is under quarantine for the coronavirus. That would be ironic considering he has been directed by Trump to manage the crisis.

  • Reply AirgiodFeochadan March 4, 2020 at 5:59 am

    If the Coronavirus prevents Trump from being reelected, I'll be looking forward to catching it.

  • Reply Blue Rocker March 4, 2020 at 6:14 am

    Steve Colbert is a very talented piece of $h!+! So sad!

  • Reply Kea March 4, 2020 at 7:53 am

    The only thing more contagious than Corona is my music (Warnung: High risk of dance fever. Side effect: singing along all Day long! ) 😀 https://spinnup.link/179458-zigzag stay Safe and have a nice Day 🙂

  • Reply K Joyce March 4, 2020 at 8:04 am

    DR. TRUMP IS FEARLESS, AND A TINY BRAIN GENIUS.

  • Reply Grace Gisel March 4, 2020 at 8:46 am

    About Time you give some attention to the fact that the fight against coronavirus in the USA, is the worst approach in the world. A 3rd world country approach. The Ministry of Health is blacking all progress. What country you are??

  • Reply j wallace March 4, 2020 at 11:09 am

    the title of this video is a lie. its the liberals who feel we should have no borders& anyone can waltz on in anytime. where'd the virus 1st show up? santuary cities!

  • Reply D. Paul Sikand March 4, 2020 at 1:31 pm

    Colbert will have to live with Biden as his president …….
    now that is funny………!!!!!
    But that wont happen……..can you imagine what Trump
    will do to Biden in a debate……????? WOW
    Biden is a corrupt loser out of the same mould as Hillary……
    We already have more Ukraine information on Biden that
    we are just sitting on…..waiting to flush him down the toilet
    should he get the nomination……
    sick as it sounds……we Trumpers are actually hoping that
    the virus kills certain politicians……
    It will be poetic justice……….and help drain the swamp….
    Hopefully some talk show hosts are eliminated too……….

  • Reply Petitio Principii March 4, 2020 at 2:10 pm

    "Chad Wolf." Come on, for how long this charade that we're not living in a new worldwide-immersive SNL movie-play-reality-show is going to keep trying to pass by as reality?

  • Reply D. Adam March 4, 2020 at 2:36 pm

    As of two nights ago, USA had the highest mortality rate based on per capita of those infected, recovered and died. I did the math — exhaustively. Philippines leads with a mortality rate of 33%, (their population, their 3 cases and 1 died), second in the world is the USA with a mortality rate of 5.94%. "Just about air tight, my butt.

  • Reply F. O. March 4, 2020 at 2:50 pm

    Looking forward to your arrest clown

  • Reply Bob Nordstrom March 4, 2020 at 3:03 pm

    Trump did more in 3 years then Obama in 8 much more

  • Reply Bob Nordstrom March 4, 2020 at 3:05 pm

    Vote Trump in 2020 keep America great

  • Reply dogshack2 March 4, 2020 at 5:50 pm

    I didn't know that Nest had a door bell camera. Cool. Gotta get one. How do i get it real faast? Gotta get it now. i wish there was a service.

  • Reply Darvin Smith March 4, 2020 at 6:48 pm

    I can see them trying to shut down polls in blue states claiming the conronavirus is there 😎

  • Reply Brandon Drew March 4, 2020 at 7:22 pm

    I'm glad thousands of people dying is now a national joke. You people are sick.

  • Reply Dustin Harford March 4, 2020 at 8:13 pm

    4:18 Damnit, Colbert, you had the perfect opportunity to make a quip about the toothbrush mustache!

  • Reply Cheshire Kat March 4, 2020 at 8:34 pm

    The media are making such a big deal over nothing.
    Yes, it has a higher mortality rate of the average flu, but less than the Spanish Flu of the early 20th century (which had a 2 percent mortality rate).
    The only people who are really at risk, are the same people who are at risk for the regular flu (the elderly, and those with weak immune systems).
    As long as you practice proper hygiene (wash your hands, wash your hands, wash your hands), it's no big deal for the average person.

  • Reply ЯУАИ Joseph March 4, 2020 at 10:03 pm

    I think the law should Arrest people who spoil their offspring because that is sick if you think about. The Vaccine could Defiling the people so it my belief to be full of the Cerveza. I don't like battery acid in my flesh. Could the magnetosphere collapse with the pole shifts of the Earth and Sun and cause them to explode?

  • Reply Steven D. Bennett March 4, 2020 at 10:16 pm

    That's the left's hope, which is why we voted for Trump in '16.

  • Reply Renate Cox March 4, 2020 at 11:49 pm

    Trump will blame anyone if he loses even a virus. Moron.

  • Reply Erin Thesystem March 5, 2020 at 12:54 am

    Oh NO!! THIS is getting serious now- the STOCK MARKET is ailing!!! 😱

  • Reply HorseWaterDrink March 5, 2020 at 1:08 am

    I remember when comedy used to be funny now it's all full of PC virus

  • Reply Georgia Robinson March 5, 2020 at 3:39 am

    What virus????
    The influenza has killed more people then any other virus in the world

  • Reply Bruce Smith March 5, 2020 at 5:05 am

    colbert is the lowest snake on the talk shows.

  • Reply Johnson Johnson March 5, 2020 at 5:06 am

    I’d like to point out, there is a 100% chance you are going to die.

  • Reply Common Sense March 5, 2020 at 7:16 am

    REPULSIVE CLOWN. YOUR BEHAVIOR ONLY PROOF YOUR LACK OF TALENT, YOUR LACK OF DECENCY. IT IS DISGUSTING THAT AT YOUR EDGE YOU EXHIBIT GREAT DESIRE OF FAME AND MONEY NO MATTER AT WHAT COST. YOUR SHAMELESS COMMENTS PROMOTE MOCK, PRMOTE HATRED, PROMOTE ANTI PATRIOTISM, PROMOTE DISRESPECT, PROMOTE DIVISION, PROMOTE ANARCHY. SHAME OF YOU.

  • Reply Sophie K March 5, 2020 at 7:25 am

    Coronavirus will cause a deep recession in China, and probably have a domino reaction around the world.
    South Korea, Italy and Iran have quarantines I wonder if we are next? It started with just one person in China, hard to believe .

  • Reply W P March 5, 2020 at 12:10 pm

    Witness Me ! Lol

  • Reply SandyRiverBlue March 5, 2020 at 2:59 pm

    Hello, this is your Captain speaking, we have a small fire in our left engine but don't worry you're probably not going to die.

  • Reply Trevor Templeton March 5, 2020 at 5:14 pm

    Your misspellings inspire great confidence in the people, sir.

  • Reply Toxh ツ March 5, 2020 at 9:06 pm

    I am live and have a coronavirus live map 🔴

  • Reply Tony Parks March 5, 2020 at 11:21 pm

    #unhoused 👌 😎

  • Reply Steve French March 6, 2020 at 12:53 am

    Robben island. Perhaps if he had visited it since that time and learned the history he would know how it’s pronounced. I’m from the frozen prairies in Canada and even I know.

  • Reply Jordan Sebert March 6, 2020 at 1:53 am

    God I loved colbert but good god man your sources are completely trash. Cant believe you would follow the norm and portray trump like that. I dont get it. He has done so much for minorities and us as a whole. He has created thousands of jobs since hes been in. I dont like him at all or his personality but god this is so bias and hateful. Do your research guys.

  • Reply Jaelyn Brose March 6, 2020 at 2:34 am

    The Dems would call this a pandemic, even if only one person died. BTW… only 12 have died in the U.S. of the Coronavirus. About 10,000 more than that have died of the common flu this season, in the U.S.. Why don't I hear the Dems whining about that?

  • Reply Felicia Santiago March 6, 2020 at 10:45 am

    Trump cares about nothing but himself 😒

  • Reply Felicia Santiago March 6, 2020 at 10:48 am

    Republicans suuuuuck😒

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